some of y'all really need to re-examine what the word racist means because it’s not always just “loud and proud white supremacist intentionally causing harm”. sometimes it’s “otherwise ‘nice’ person acting on internalized racial biases that they refuse to examine”.
like my god the second “racist” gets dropped in a conversation some of you completely shut down under the weight of all your white fragility and refuse to listen to or act upon any criticism of your harmful actions, however intentional or unconscious they may be, and it’s honestly pathetic. grow the hell up. learn to be uncomfortable in discussions about racism or you’re never going to become better.
The first time I left the US was on a trip with my grandmother to Germany. My grandmother was always traveling. Always! Always off on some holiday somewhere, always bringing back tacky souvenirs.
I spoke a bit of German but was far from fluent. I’d been a little worried about communication but my grandmother assured me we’d be fine. She did this all the time, after all.
My grandmother left me in the hotel room one morning to sleep in while she went to the nearby bakery to get some pastries for breakfast. When she returned, she looked very flustered. She got me up because she had to get this off her chest. The woman in the bakery… didn’t speak ANY English. In her words, “Not a lick of English! Not one word!” I replied, heavy with sarcasm, “Really? In GERMANY?” She didn’t pick up on my sarcasm at all and just thought I was equally as astonished as her.
Turns out every trip she’d ever taken was with some pre-planned tour group for obnoxious white Americans. Never in all her years of traveling had she just gone into a small local shop and had to interact with a local whose entire business didn’t revolve around serving people like her. It was a genuine surprise to her that a person - especially a white person! - would actually not understand English.
I later went down to the bakery to apologize as well as I could in German. Fortunately the woman found it very amusing that the American woman just kept talking louder and slower instead of trying to communicate in some other way, and wasn’t bothered at all. But from that day forward I understood something about my grandmother (and a whole hell of a lot of other Americans) that I could never unlearn. That she literally saw everywhere in the world that wasn’t America like some kind of giant fucking Disney World and everyone who didn’t speak English as some kind of bumbling savage. I was embarrassed to be seen with her, ashamed to be there with her. This is very much A Thing and it’s fucking awful.
When I was young and traveling in the late 90s and to about 2007 I want to say? Every time we left the United states we were sat down and would go through some vocabulary that kids should know. Mainly thank yous, hellos and arbitrary pleasantries.
I learned why this was so important the first time we went to France, we entered a port town after leaving England via boat. My Mother barely speaking French, it was nearing 9pm and we had missed the train because of a docking issue to get to our booked hotel.
The ticket master of the ferry pointed us towards an old inn run by the sweetest woman I had ever met. She met us outside of it, waving us over and through my Mom’s poor French and the Innkeepers broken english the two worked so much out. And after signing us in before she went to prep the room herself. She brought each of my siblings a tea pot filled with some of the best hot chocolate I ever had. Because it was so chilly. The next morning she did the same.
Every time I said Merci in french she’d just light up, she even help me learn a few extra things in the short time of breakfast. Apple, orange, tea cup.
It’s one of my favourite memories as a kid and something I try to show to people who can’t speak English visiting America as I work retail. Because, expecting fluent English is rude.
Appreciate people that can speak your language, no matter how small, because they’re doing their best.
I work at a non profit that specifically works with immigrant women. I can’t give specifics of any interactions due to confidentiality, but I can say that many of the white people I work with are impatient at best and downright rude at worst to the women who don’t speak English fluently. This sounds counterintuitive, right? That people working or volunteering at a centre for immigrant women would act like that to women who don’t speak English?
These white people travel or volunteer for their own egos, their own agendas. People are props to them, and people who don’t speak English (especially people of colour) are props that they can’t use.
The English language as a measure of people’s intelligence and/or worth is exactly what the colonists intended. Don’t let yourself be a part of that.
This is pretty nuanced a joke. Theyre both reaching for the charging handle on where the other’s gun would be, outing both of them as spies.
wait a sec i gotta look something up
…
yep this is funny
Okay, for all those who need clarification:
The “Russian” is reaching towards the back of the riffle, where the charging handle would be on an American riffle, while the “American” is reaching towards the side of the riffle, where charging handle would be on a Russian riffle, this revealing them as spies.
Also, and I love this bit: The Russian spy says “help”, but the American spy says “блядь”, which is Russian for “damn”.
I love niche jokes SO fucking much. Especially when ppl explain what they mean cuz then I get!! Information and!! A funny joke?? Hello??
agree 100%. so important that I am going to paste the rest of it here. (one note– I think that the author goes by Daniel Ortberg nowadays, but don’t quote me on that. regardless, Ortberg is a treasure)
GAWAIN: your clothes – your hair – your face – they’re all green
GREEN KNIGHT: that’s not all of me that’s green
GAWAIN: what is that supposed to mean
GREEN KNIGHT: let’s play a game you hit me today and i’ll hit you a year from now
GAWAIN: it’s Christmas
GREEN KNIGHT: fine hit me today and i’ll hit you a year and a day from now happy?
GAWAIN: I don’t understand the rules of this game or the prize what is the end goal here
GREEN KNIGHT: are you going to try to cut my head off or what
[GAWAIN cuts the GREEN KNIGHT’s head off]
GREEN KNIGHT: great hit see you in a year
[The GREEN KNIGHT picks his head up and rides away]
GAWAIN: oh my God
KING ARTHUR: honestly my advice to you is not even worry about this
GUINEVERE: yeah do not take this seriously
GAWAIN: why would I do that that’s a terrible idea this man can’t die and I have to let him strike me in a year
KING ARTHUR: look i just said that was my advice
GREEN KNIGHT: welcome to my castle, we’ve definitely never cut off each other’s heads before, my name is Bertilak and I am a regular human color, how are you
GAWAIN: Hello thank you for your hospitality, but I cannot stay long I have an appointment with a man at the Green Chapel in a few days
GREEN KNIGHT: that is JUST down the road from here, probably you should just stay here until it’s time for that, stay here with me and my wife
GAWAIN: very well I accept
GREEN KNIGHT: oh but shoot I have to go on a hunt, like right now so why don’t we just agree to play a game for as long as you’re staying here where I bring you whatever I find during the day and you bring me whatever you find during the day
GAWAIN: what an odd suggestion why don’t I just come hunting with you instead?
GREEN KNIGHT: NO YOU STAY HERE IN THE CASTLE AND YOU GIVE ME WHATEVER YOU FIND HERE
GAWAIN: but you already own everything in the castle, it’s your c –
GREEN KNIGHT: I WILL SEE YOU ON THE MORROW
LADY BERTILAK: whatcha kissin’
GAWAIN: what? nothing
LADY BERTILAK: let’s make out
GAWAIN: I don’t feel like we should do that
LADY BERTILAK: if you don’t kiss me at least once it would really hurt my feelings
GAWAIN: well if it would hurt your feelings
LADY BERTILAK: great now you can make out with my husband tonight
GREEN KNIGHT: GAWAIN I have brought you a deer from today’s hunt what do you have for me
GAWAIN: I uh I guess I have some kissing for you to have
GREEN KNIGHT: sounds great [they kiss] ok see you tomorrow
GAWAIN: oh I really don’t want to play this game again, this is making me sort of unco –
GREEN KNIGHT: see you tomorrow
LADY BERTILAK: let’s have sex
GAWAIN: Okay, no for two reasons one is that you are my host’s wife and also it goes against every vow of knighthood ever and the second half of the second reason is that then I would have to also have sex with your husband according to your weird castle sex game
LADY BERTILAK: mm that sounds like a Gawain problem not a Lady Bertilak problem
GAWAIN: I’m not having sex with you
LADY BERTILAK: fine here’s my underwear though, you have to take it otherwise it would be rude
GAWAIN: well I don’t want to be rude excuse me, I have to go kiss your husband again
GREEN KNIGHT: Well, Gawain it’s been a great time here at Castle Makeout but you’d better go fight that Green Knight you keep talking about
GAWAIN: I will probably perish when it is his turn to deliver the blow Farewell, friend
GREEN KNIGHT: Gawain Gawain it was me the whole time
GAWAIN: what
GREEN KNIGHT: I’m the same guy and I’m not gonna kill you I’m just gonna fuck up your neck a little because you kept my wife’s underwear and didn’t tell me but you’re all right, guy you’re all right
GAWAIN: what the hell what the hell was the point of any of this why the hell did you set all this up for
GREEN KNIGHT: :)
GAWAIN: what the HELL
KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE: henceforth we shall all wear green sashes to celebrate the valuable lesson we have learned this day
Everything about this is a masterpiece: the girl that says “wow” and the girl that says “hi” shyly and bill awkwardly lifting his hand to say hi to them I’m cracking THE FUCK UP
The way they all immediately straightened up their postures like the fuckin pope walked in 😂 the sheer power this cool science man has over the american people is palpable
♪
